We Can Read People But We Aren't Mind Readers

A man left me a note on his signed credit card receipt that read, “Horribly slow service.”  In the office world, this would be the equivalent of a stranger writing a note on a sticky pad and slapping it on someone’s desk that said, “You suck at your job.”  Then with no further explanation, the person walks away, never to be seen again. 

You can imagine how frustrating that would be and why that nasty little phrase continues to haunt me.

First of all, his service was not “horribly slow.”   My busser and I were on our game.  Yes, it was a bit busy at that time, but it was manageable.  In no way did this couple wait an exorbitant amount of time for anything to deem it “horrible.” 

Secondly, if your soda was refilled constantly, would you call your service horrible?  When this man first ordered his Diet Pepsi he mentioned he would be drinking a lot of it.  As any attentive server would do, I prepared a pitcher of Diet Pepsi immediately and set it in my side station just a few feet away from his table in order to give him frequent refills.  I didn’t let his Diet Pepsi go empty for more than a few minutes; in fact I hardly let it get below ¾ empty.  He drank over two pitchers.  That alone should qualify as decent service… right?  He asked me to keep his drink full and between my assistant and I we did exactly that. 

In his defense, the food did take longer than it should have.  A first course should usually come out within ten minutes.  But this couple didn’t order a first course, so naturally it might have seemed like dinner took a while to come out.  From my calculations, their meal was delivered in 20-25 minutes (normally a dinner should arrive within that 20 minutes).  I even checked on them and told them their food should be coming out soon.  All he said was, “Okay.”  He never seemed angry. 

Shortly after their food came out, I asked him how their food was and he replied, “Fine” or perhaps “Good,” but nothing negative.

When he asked for the check, I brought it immediately.  I picked up his credit card within a couple minutes, ran it and brought it back instantly.  It couldn’t have been more than five minutes from the time he asked for the check until he received his credit card slip to sign.  For dinner service, that timeline should not be considered slow.

Thirdly (and the most frustrating part of leaving a note in this manner) is the lack of communication on his part.  If he was in a hurry, he should have told me.  If he didn’t enjoy his meal, he should have let me know.  Communication is key for both the server and the guest.  Most servers are good at reading people, but we can’t read minds.  If he mentioned he thought the food took too long, I could have at least tried to resolve the situation by offering soup or salad in the meantime or offering a dessert on the house to go.  Something.  But because I wasn’t aware he felt the way he did until after he left, how can I possibly fix the situation?  I’m convinced some people just prefer to be irritated and unhappy.    

On that note, I noticed this couple didn’t say much to each other throughout their entire meal.  I had been wondering if maybe they had just gotten into a fight.  Or perhaps he or she was having a bad week at work.  It’s also feasible they’re just quite people.  In any case, regardless of what they were going through, it still doesn’t seem fair to take out any possible personal issues on a random stranger who is providing a service. 

I serve humanity the best I can every day.  If you have an issue, tell me and most likely I'll be able to make it better.  It's that simple. 

One more important note:  My sensitivity meter was at an all time high on this particular day.  I had just spent the previous few days saying goodbye to my Grandfather for what will most likely be the last time before he passes.  I had to mention this as a reminder that you never know what a stranger might be going through; a simple reminder that we are all human beings and to treat others (even strangers) with kindheartedness and respect.  ~ HK ~